dial down the crazy

I don't know if other people get this way, but the last several weeks of pregnancy bring out a whole new level of crazy in my already- distractible self. It's a good thing Dan knows what he's getting into when he arrives for his weekends home. How could I really explain it to anyone else who had to live with us for a few days at a time?

I sleep nightly until 3 am and then am wide awake for at least an hour...sometimes for good. That doesn't help. I should be sleeping now, as a matter of fact.

I start projects all over the house and don't manage to finish them. Like, any of them. Drop by and I'll show you proof.

My internal conversation goes something like this...

Hmmm....Monday. Let's see, what should we do tomorrow?

We need groceries. Yuck, that will take hours. We should go to Target. I think they sell Baby Bjorns there. I should check the price online at Amazon and see which place sells them for less.

I should take a picture of our old one. It's so threadbare. I want to capture what four babies can do to one of those things before it disintegrates.

Where is the camera?

Ooh, and there's a Michael's coupon in the paper... what do we need from Michael's?

I think we have a bottle of paint to return there.

Where is that ad?

I need to return the random thing I bought to the children's resale shop. I wonder if they're open on Labor Day? I should call them. Darnit, I bet they're already closed.

I should look up the number.

Start to walk to the computer.

Labor day...OH! I should finish packing that bag for the hospital.

Start walking upstairs.

I wonder if the dryer is done - I was waiting for a nightgown that's in there.

Walk into to the laundry room. See the MOUNTAIN of clean clothes that are waiting to be put away. Pick up and fold, oh, three things. Notice a bad smell. Turn around and walk out.

What is that?....OH LUKE. Let's change you!

Luke: No, mama, I ok!

He runs.

I should chase him.

The dryer stops. I should pull those clothes out so they don't get wrinkled.

Wait a minute, do I hear the phone downstairs?

Me: Emma, Daniel, is the phone ringing? (No response as their heads are bent over their Nintendo DS's).

I trip over a lightsaber on my way through the playroom. That makes me think of Alex (our nephew).

Alex! I need to burn the photos of his birthday party onto a disk for Jodi (Dan's sister)! Before I forget! Before the baby comes!

Walk downstairs to the computer. Smell Luke again but still don't see him.

Me: Emma! Is Luke out there with you?

Emma: Yeah, I think so (barely audible).

Crud, I forgot to start running the water in the washing machine. Those sheets really need to be done by bedtime. Do I even have enough time before bedtime to finish them?

What time is it? Man, I'm hungry.

Go back upstairs to start the water and add the soap. Fold two more pieces of clothing in the pile then remember I should burn the photos.

Burn...I need to bring the emergency escape ladder that I bought upstairs! I need to show the big kids how to use it in case we're ever trapped upstairs in a fire! What if that happened this year and I'm here alone with five kids to evacuate by myself! I need to get it! Now!

Back down the stairs, this time grabbing the laundry basket full of photo albums sitting at the base of the stairway. Each album contains one picture I've been hoping to scan into the computer for weeks. For this blog.

I'm hungry.

I hope Luke doesn't hurt these albums, they're getting kind of frail.

Now I'm sitting at the computer about to scan photos.

OH, and burn photos!

Burn! I need to look for that ladder! Did I put it in the basement?

I look at the screen and realize we never finished our Amazon.com order. The one Emma has asked me about three times.

She has really been doing a good job of babysitting the older boys, that girl. I should follow through with helping her order her book.

Should I add the new Baby Bjorn to the cart? Oh, better talk with Dan about that first. Darnit, he's still en route to Houston. We'll have to call him later.

OK, photos.

Do I remember how to burn photos onto a disk?

Where are the disks?

Noah: Mom, Lukey smells bad!

Darnit, he's wearing a cloth diaper. That's going to be a huge mess.

Suddenly our kids see the neighbor children outside and with shouts of glee they all RUN out the back door. This, of course, includes Luke. Drag him back into the house to be changed.

As I'm dunking and flushing the cloth diaper Noah walks up behind me and asks for apple slices. You know, the way Miss Chris (my very organized, calm friend) makes them, with the peanut butter spread right on them?

Me: Just a minute, I need to finish this. Maybe you could just wash and eat an apple?

Noah: Nah, I'll wait.

Luke, noticing that I've turned my head to talk to Noah, runs.

Now where was I?

*******************************************************************

I have to confess that I started this post a week ago. It's taken me this long to finish.

countdown

Baby girl should make her appearance in about two weeks...give or take. :) You know how these things go...

Dan's fellowship will be over in 43 weeks.

Have a great day!

Team Fulkerson

simple

Is there anything that brings a two-year-old more joy than a balloon?

Even better for mom, a free balloon?

We love you, Trader Joe's!

Special thanks to two big brothers, who shared their balloons with Luke after the red one he chose sailed skyward while we were trying to load into the van...

the view from here

I don't want to hear a word about the state of my pedicure. When I look down, this is what I see.

For a few more weeks, anyway...

:)

tired

You won't hear him admit it, but Dan is tired.

I don't know exactly what his days entail, as he says he loves to come home and NOT have to talk about work. What I do know goes a little something like this.

He gets up at either 4:00 or 4:30 a.m., depending on the day. He packs his lunch and drives to work, Diet Coke in hand. Some days he gets to sit down and eat lunch, others he doesn't get to eat again until he tears into it during the drive home. He works until the work is done, which means he might come home at 4:30 p.m., he might come home at 8:30 p.m., or he might not come home at all. If he's lucky enough to make it home in the evening he eats, Skypes* with us, and goes to bed. He is on call 24-7 except for the weekends he comes home...so that's 12 days at a time. Some of his pages (in this Jetsons-age we live in) can be answered by phone using his laptop to download films; others require him to go back to work, no matter what time it is. The next day it starts all over again.

When he climbed into the van at the Indianapolis Airport last Friday night at nearly 11:30 p.m. I could tell by looking at his eyes that he hadn't slept in... awhile. He didn't want to answer my questions but finally admitted that his last night of sleep had been on Wednesday - though he was quick to point out that he'd caught an hour-long nap at some point on Thursday before he was paged back to work.

Dan doesn't talk about the children he meets at Texas Children's Hospital. I think that some of their stories are too sad to dwell on so he does his best to leave them in Texas when he climbs aboard his bi-weekly flights. After "sleeping in" on his Saturday mornings here (meaning he gets up at 7:30 or 8:00 a.m.....even though that's 6:30 or 7:00 a.m. to his body clock) he starts his work with our children. They take turns throughout our two days together, choosing what they'd like to do with Daddy. Emma usually chooses to have puzzle time with him. Daniel and Noah like to play sports in the backyard. They all play board games together --which is usually most successful when Luke is napping. Luke likes to wrestle on the floor and read stories.

Dan insists that I take a nap while he works through his rotation.

Between his Daddy-time appointments he fits in haircuts, "honey-do" list items and booking more airline flights home. He always exercises - often for the first time in the two weeks since he's been gone. He reads his Sports Illustrateds, The Indianapolis Star, and starts working through whatever medical journals have arrived. Our whole family goes to bed around 9 p.m. Saturday night to help him recoup some of the lost sleep. Too soon it's Sunday afternoon and we're on the way back to the airport. During the drive he always asks the kids to figure out the countdown to his next visit. He tells them to start making lists of all of the things they want to do together when he's here next time. Then he's gone.

I'm so proud of Dan for taking this year to train as a pediatric specialist. I've been told over the years that he does a great job explaining things to parents and answering their questions. Even more important to those parents, he talks or jokes with their sick children to try to put them at ease. It takes a special person to do his job day after day. Hats off to all of you who teach, heal, and tend children for a living. They're jobs that require lots of prayer to sustain with glad hearts.

I cringe when I hear stories about crass doctors, impatient doctors, or surgeons who don't look their patients in the eye when they meet. I wouldn't want to make excuses for purposely treating patients that way - ever. Having met lots of physicians during these 'training' years, here's what I can offer by way of possible explanation, if you ever have a less-than-fantastic interaction when you're at the doctor's office.

If your physician is ever a little "off," keep in mind that they might be ill, although of course they'd never tell you how they're feeling. I know our own (very special) pediatrician fought terrible all-day sickness for half of (each) of her pregnancies, seeing patients between her own vomiting sessions. I doubt many people are able to hide sickness as well as she did!

Sometimes your doctor may have a disorder of some sort that makes their bedside manner - eh- not great, but makes them a very meticulous surgeon. (Is obsessive-compulsive disorder necessarily a bad trait in your brain surgeon or your cardiologist?)

Maybe, sometimes, they're just tired.

Please keep Dan in your prayers this year. Thanks, in advance, from Team Fulkerson.

countdown

It's about 3 weeks until Baby Girl arrives!

Dan's fellowship will be over in 44 weeks.

Have a great week, everyone!

say what?

This story relates to yesterday's OB/GYN visit (see previous post).

I am the first to admit that my medical knowledge is minimal. I was an elementary education major in college, and my minor/concentration was a kindergarten endorsement (early childhood education classes). I never took anatomy and really only know a few basic things from living with Dan all of these years that he's been training.

When the doctor came into the room yesterday (not my doctor, but one of her partners) she noted immediately that I have an induction date scheduled already, with a question in her voice. Here's the following exchange.

Me: Yeah, we have it scheduled so hopefully my husband will be here. He's doing a fellowship in Texas this year.

Dr.: OH, what field?

Me: Pediatric neurosurgery.

Dr. : You must wonder what you were thinking, planning to be pregnant THIS year!

Me: Well, you know...we were planning to wait one more year but this is when God sent her so this is when she's coming! (I've delivered this response so many times it's automatic, even though to most people who ask I'd rather say IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS, or THANKS FOR POINTING OUT OUR STUPIDITY.)

Dr.: Seems to me like maybe the neurosurgeon needs some neurosurgery of his own, if you know what I mean!

Me: Blank stare.

In my mind I'm trying to figure out what it is that she means...

Is it choice A) that it is so crazy to have another baby that my husband needs brain surgery?

or

B) that she thinks neurosurgeons perform vasectomies.

Dr.: You know, some neurosurgery for himself.

This doctor is about my mom's age -- I don't feel comfortable correcting her. Not knowing how to respond I just spill even more personal details about our plans for our procreative future.

Those of you who are medical professionals can feel free to clue me in...but when did the male reproductive parts become part of the neurological system?

Just something to ponder.

Happy Thursday to all!

how was your wednesday?

I'm not normally someone who tries to stuff too much into one day. That just begs for trouble. I especially try to keep our days low-key when I'm pregnant, because I tire easily and am very scatter-brained. Still, I throw caution to the wind this morning and take Luke out to do several errands. We race home, unload groceries for 10 minutes and pack some lunch, then drive back to the babysitter's so Luke can hang out while I have my 35 week OB appointment. (That appointment was my gift today, as Baby Girl is head-down and perking along perfectly. That in itself makes the rest of this post downright petty.)

I try not to be too annoyed when the OB (one of my doctor's partners) points out that it wasn't very smart to plan to have a baby when my husband isn't living with us. I really try not to be annoyed when she suggests maybe he should go get some surgery to take care things. (Wouldn't you think OBs would like people having babies?). I'm thankful I'll be with my doctor again at the next visit, and make a mental note to start praying that this doctor is NOT the one who delivers Baby Girl, because who knows what I might say when I'm in labor. I mean, Dan and I are in our late 30's - we get it. I prefer my doctor's partners would smile, introduce themselves, say things look great and send me on my way. I don't necessarily need to explain the words SURPRISE BLESSING to them. You'd think in their line of work they'd be a little more sensitive to that.

On the way back to the sitter's I notice that we have very little gas left in the van, but since I have to go to town two more times this afternoon I figure there's always time to stop later.

We head home for a quick nap. Yeah, I'm complaining on a day that I had a nap, for Pete's sake.

Sad.

Although, had I not had that short nap, I'm not sure I would have made it through the rest of the afternoon without causing some kind of public scene.

Emma arrives home and 10 minutes later we are on the road to pick up the boys from school in order to get to Emma's physical therapy appointment on time. The four boys (our three plus our nephew Alex) are going to be easy to entertain, I tell myself...we'll drop Emma off and head to their shangri-la...McDonald's. The on-and-off rainshowers have since stopped and by some miracle none of them needed to use the bathroom, so we are free to eat ice cream and let them play on the outdoor playground. Fantastic! Easy! I am going to win all sorts of brownie points for this!

The rest of the afternoon goes something kind of like this:

The Mcplayground is wet and slippery-- it must have rained longer in town than it did at our house-- which means the boys love it. Soon they're sopping wet, but hey, who cares? We're heading straight home, right?

It's time to leave and everyone is really wet. Sopping shoes, nearly-in-tears-because-it-feels-so-yucky wet.

I assure them the appointment will be over very soon and we'll be on our way home.

We drive to physical therapy. We park a few feet away from the doorway so I can leave Daniel in charge while I run in to collect Emma.

Emma's not done.

Four wet, complaining boys are stuck in the van. When I step inside the office again to pay the bill I look out office windows to see Daniel hanging his socks out the van window, wringing the water from them.

Emma's still not done.

I sit in the van and listen to the discourse, which includes great phrases like YOU SQUEEZED MY WIENER and LUKEY KICKED MY PRIVATES, all delivered in REALLY LOUD VOICES.

Emma's still not done.

Twenty minutes have gone by and there's no sign of her....then the desk clerk realizes she's been curled up in a quiet corner. Reading.

"Why on earth didn't you come out to the van?" I ask.

"It's a really awesome book, Mom."

We make it back out to the van. Where is my cell phone? It's gotta be here...

Daniel announces with a grimace that the book he's supposed to read for homework isn't in his backpack. It's only the third day of school. Sigh.

We're only a few blocks from the library so, with great irritation, I decide to try to find a copy of Caddie Woodlawn. I figure it will be easier than trying to chase down a copy from a classmate- and we still have to drop off my nephew, eat dinner, and take Daniel to a karate class this evening. Like, within the next hour.

Where is that cell phone?

We drive to the library and I tell everyone we must quickly run inside and get the book. Wet boys are complaining now not only about being wet but hungry, too. Emma sits down to search the online catalog while I keep a death grip on Luke's shirt. For some reason library = run away to that kid.

No copies available.

I see a dear friend, who takes one look at me and asks what she can do to help. Since she doesn't have a magic wand I'm guessing not much.

We load back into the van.

WHERE IS THE CELL PHONE?

Do I have enough gas to even get back to the physical therapy office - the last place I saw the stupid phone?

We drive back to the office and I see the phone on the ground when I open my van door...I have missed driving over it by a few inches.

Relieved, we finally head toward home, winding through the country roads due to a detour.

Then I remember that we are running on fumes.

Back into town we go so we can fill up. Maybe the steam coming out of my ears has clued the kids in--no one asks what we're doing or why. It's actually quiet in the van.

Drive to our neighborhood, drop Alex off, home at last. Forget karate - he can take a make-up class. At this point you couldn't pay me enough money to get back in that van, and we wouldn't have enough time to get there, anyway.

Food, drink, routine. All is well.

I haven't even lost the cell phone since we got here.

countdown AND first day of school!

It's about 4 weeks until Baby Girl arrives! Dan's fellowship is over in 45 weeks.

Today was the first day of first grade (for Noah, as well as our cousin Alex), fourth grade (for Daniel), and sixth grade (for Emma)!

Happy back-to-school day, everyone!

countdown

It's about five weeks until Baby Girl arrives.

There are 46 weeks until Dan's fellowship is over.

It's Indiana State Fair time!  The "featured" foods this year are chocolate-covered bacon and beaver BBQ.

I don't think we're going to the fair this time around...

Have a great Monday! 

Team Fulkerson

it's gotta be done

I'm not one who relishes my own maternity photos.  Love the babies, love the anticipation of the baby coming...not so much in love with the pregnant version of myself.  I have been looking online for ideas for maternity photos and boy, are there some people out there who REALLY want to capture what they look like heavily pregnant.  Like, how every naked inch of themselves looked while heavily pregnant - sometimes close-up.  

Good for them...though some of their pictures make me cringe almost as much as my own fully clothed ones!  If you don't believe me, do a google search.   Sorry, but however miraculous it is, it ain't always pretty. 

Being this far along always makes me crazy-obsessed with something.  This week's obsession was capturing photos of the kids and the baby belly together in some form.   Dan was home this weekend and was a great sport about serving as photogtrapher.   He's a brave man, knowing I'd spend a lot of time obsessing over the pictures, cropping like a mad woman, likely finding fault with every single shot.  I have to say I think he did a great job considering that most of his subjects didn't really understand what on earth we were trying to capture.   At least Luke didn't ask questions or complain- he just yelled "lollipop!" over and over...the right bribe for this task, thank goodness! 

photo of the day

 This was a Christmas gift this past year - I love love love getting photos for Christmas!  :)  Many thanks to Dan's mom (who knew how much I'd love this!) and the Warsaw Times Union.

countdown

Hey all, 

It's about 6 weeks until Baby Girl arrives. :)

Dan's fellowship has 47 weeks left.

Hope your Monday has been great! 

tradition

A few years ago we started taking a group photo of the kids in the summertime.   We used to make the trek to JCPenney every time, which yielded great results but filled everyone with dread.   Team Fulkerson voted and decided to let Mom take the photo here in our own yard a year or two ago, and we've stuck with that method.  Announcing it's picture day still fills the photo's subjects with dread, but it sure makes Mommy happy.   Here are some of today's results...